A Losing Battle
by TheMeThatCanRead
Summary: AoKise. Aomine is suffering from a terminal illness, but doesn't want anyone to know. Kise knows this. How is Kise going to cope with the knowledge of knowing that the one he loves could die at any given moment? After all, both Aomine and Kise know that Aomine is fighting a losing battle.


Hello! It's TheMeThatCanRead here! Full name, TheMeThatCanReadButCan'tWrite. So why am I uploading this? It sucks. Seriously. I wasted my time on this. So might as well upload it, but I advise you click the back button before you regret reading it. Seriously. It's got all the cliché stuff. You know, sappy romance, little meaningless arguments, sickness, stuff like that. OOC-ness, (A lot of ooc-ness) Rushed storyline, rushed ending, messed up timeline...the works. So yeah. You can either read this, if you do, I'll assume you're extremely bored) or back out. Oh yeah, first fic. Man, this is embarrassing. I wrote _this_ as a first fic.  
Disclaimer: I disclaim all these characters, and I would disclaim the plot too, but that belongs to me.

* * *

Most people held the assumption that Kise had merely joined the basketball team due to lack of much else to do. What did it matter? He would always master whatever he set his honey coloured eyes to. It didn't take long until the star players in any sport would fall to him.

No, it was not the sport itself. Perhaps basketball did play a key role in the entirety of his situation, but it was not basketball alone. It was the person that had introduced him to the wonderful sport – the person who had taught him to love that very sport.

Never had he seen anyone as enthusiastic about a sport as Aomine was. Each training session that was laid forth was met with eager eyes, as deep and blue as sapphires. Each game was played with an unparalleled vigour that was shown clearly through the confident smirk on his features, or each roll of his muscles as he moved.

None of these details ever passed Kise's eyes which, while not as observant as Kuroko's, were still potent in the area of catching small details. However, all these small details always pertained to a certain olive-skinned bluenet.

Not the fluttering of his eyelashes as he took a nap during classes, or the way his lips would quirk up when he was amused. Not even the certain habit he'd have of tying his laces before heading onto court, then tightening them after a test trial.

Not even the slight regret within his now dull eyes when he'd left his shadow behind. Or the tiny spot of blood by his lips, for that matter. Not even the slightly harsher breathing pattern as opposed to his normal silent inhales and exhales.

Which was why. Why he would silently watch when he thought no one could see him. Why he'd be attentive to Kuroko so that Aomine wouldn't have a straight off reason to toss him away. After all, Aomine held the shadow in high regard, even when he had stopped playing with him.

When that had happened, the games of one-on-one had stopped abruptly as well. Kise was saddened by the fact. Of course, Aomine would never feel the same towards him as he did towards the ace, so Kise didn't dare bring the topic to light if he ever conversed with the bluenet.

He was sure that if Aomine did feel the same, the bluenet would just be the rash person he always was, and blurt it out to his face. That was something the Aomine he knew would do. Get it done, and feel embarrassed later.

Kise looked up from his thoughts. Oh, speak of the devil.

"Aominecchi!" Kise called, a sunshine and roses smile present on his face, followed by rainbow coloured smile pheromones drifting around his being as his honey coloured eyes sparkled brightly in the direction of the bluenet.

His smile dimmed ever so slightly to the point of unnoticeable as Aomine turned to face him with a cynical stare. Kise really missed the Aomine that would always grin and yell out some smart comment to tease him.

He could spot another few spots by the ace's lips once more, and his smile almost fell. He pulled his blue tartan patterned scarf from his neck, and held it out to Aomine, a half-annoyed half-petulant expression on his face.

"Put this on, Aominecchi. It's cold out, and you don't even have a sweater!" Aomine raised an eyebrow before turning his back to the blond and beginning to walk once more.

"Idiot. I'm not cold. Keep your scarf." Kise pouted, and ran up to him.

"But Aominecchi, your hair is saying something else~" the blonde queried.

"Idiot! My hair is naturally blue."

Kise reached up and grabbed the ace's shoulder's causing him to stop from surprise. The blond took advantage of the small time gap to wrap the scarf around Aomine's neck with a smile that bordered more on the warm side than the bright.

"You're human, Aominecchi, you know you'll get...sick...if you continue to walk around in this weather with nothing more than this," he stated. Aomine frowned, but made no comment. Kise grinned. "Besides – if you don't start taking proper care of yourself, I'm going to shut down a mall just to get you some decent clothes."

"...Shut up, Kise. I'm not in the mood for your attitude." The blond glanced over at Aomine when he heard the slight harshness in the bluenet's tone, and was shocked to see the bitter scowl on his features. Kise's eyes widened. He was used to seeing the glares that were thrown at the people that managed to rile up the ace, but this was different.

There seemed to be no one in particular that this expression was directed at for one thing. And the emotion with it was almost enough for Kise to blanch, much more shrink back. It was so...strong. His steps slowed to a stop.

The ace soon stopped before him, before ripping the scarf off his neck, and throwing it back at him. His eyes widened and he caught the article before him, and held it. He watched the bluenet's retreating back with a mixture of confusion and apprehension eating at his skin.

He glanced down at the woolly material in his hands before sighing and turning his back to the scene. He began to walk away, but did not wrap the scarf back around his neck, instead choosing to fold it, and hold it in his hands.

The winter wind nipped at his neck, raising his hairs, but that provoked no motivation to wear the article of clothing. His eyes were fixed on the ground as his mind revised all that he had taken in. The strange scowl...the sombre reaction when there would normally be a more snappy one...the spots of...

He shook his head. No...he was overreacting again.

A crooked smile curved onto his lips for the public. Although he had no mirror of any sort to look at his own face, he could already feel that the smile he wore was worse than a fake. It would never convince anyone who saw it. Even his faux models' smile looked more realistic.

He shivered as a particularly large gust of wind blew at his coat-clad figure. His hair was abruptly blown to the side by the force of the gust. Despite the layers of clothing that he wore, he could feel goosebumps rising on his skin.

He wondered if Aomine was telling the truth when the bluenet said he wasn't cold. Kise frowned. The bastard...he was definitely lying. Kise didn't even have to pull out that blue hair joke to prove it. The paleness of Aomine's skin was all the proof he needed.

He gritted his jaw, and continued to walk on. He had work that needed to be finished, and he prided himself in keeping at least decent grades. Besides – he was sure he'd be murdered if Kasamatsu caught him missing practice, regardless of what the reason was.

His eyes dulled at the pavement as he recalled the first time he had caught sight of it...even before Aomine had drifted away from the rest of the Kiseki. It had terrified him, but the sight that caused him to hide it, was the determination in the bluenet's eyes as he wiped his hand off on a wall, leaving behind a crimson stain.

Soon, Aomine had returned to the rest of them, all grins and hotheadedness that was merely his likeable yet unlikable character. That was the first time Kise had used a false smile on him. To his horror, it seemed as though he had succeeded in fooling the bluenet.

He gazed up at the cloudy skies, and wondered if it would snow. It was bitingly cold. He was beginning to regret not running after Aomine, but the scowl on the bluenet's face had paralyzed him into ceasing his pursuit.

He shook his head slowly. Momoi would find the bluenet and scold him for all he was worth anyway. Surely she of all people would know about this – besides, they always spent time around each other ever since childhood.

Kise's lips curved up slightly. That reminded him of all the times he would pester Aomine into playing one-on-one against him. He also remembered the amount of times he had won: a big, round, zero. But that didn't stop him from continuously bugging the blunenet.

During all their matches, he had seen that same confident smirk that he loved seeing. It never ceased to stall him from his complete potential. Why, some might ask. Such an expression was prone to gaining plenty of opposition and competition.

In Kise's heart, he knew two things. The larger remnant was that if he stopped admiring Aomine, thinking that he would never be able to play as well as the bluenet, then he truly never would. He had told himself many times to stop admiring the person who had fallen so long ago.

But that was when the smaller fragment jumped into play. Kise chuckled softly to himself. No matter how much he wanted to fight Aomine and win – no matter how much he wanted to defeat the bluenet – he knew he couldn't. There was a part of him that wanted to win, and a part of him that didn't want to see Aomine lose.

It was an unconscious instinct – he hadn't even known that was the reason – but he had not been playing the way Aomine would have wanted him to. When the truth had risen up to his conscience, he realized his mistake, and quickly rectified it. The results were both satisfying and heartbreaking.

Kise would have never wished for Aomine to lose when he knew the bluenet was already losing. He knew that Aomine was fighting – it wouldn't be Aomine if he wasn't – but the bluenet was losing. Kise frowned once more and continued to walk.

When Aomine knew there was a chance that he would lose, that was when he fought his hardest and wrestled against impossible odds. But sometimes, even that wasn't enough. Kise bit his lip. He knew it wouldn't be enough this time.

And even now, he could tell that it was gradually growing worse, so much to the point of Aomine losing his happiness, and being unable to find it even in the sport he loved. Kise could tell that the solace that the bluenet had once experienced was diminishing, and fast.

The blond swallowed. If only Aomine knew...basketball was a beautiful sport, in Kise's opinion. And when it came to beauty, Kise was a very reliable person. But what made it so beautiful was the Aomine Daiki that had played with all his strength and will with his teammates. The same Aomine who would find a way to cheer on the team, even during low morale.

Kise had seen him as a role model, but once he saw the truth, his heart broke. He wondered if anyone else knew the truth. It was obvious that Aomine didn't want anyone to know. What made it so much harder was the fact that Aomine would still press on with a smile.

That was how Kise had learned the art of the impenetrable smile, to be honest. He could smile despite his situation, even if it was obviously false. He was a model – he would smile as was forced to, even if he felt like screaming in frustration, or breaking down into tears.

No one could notice the differences any more, and since Kuroko was no longer in the same school as he, those observant eyes couldn't watch him either. Kise was sure the shorter bluenet would have picked up a thing or two during their games against each other, but that was it.

But during their days at Teiko, Aomine had genuinely loved basketball. When he had simply stopped with the reason of having no worthy opponents, Kise was shocked. Shocked and unhappy. If basketball couldn't make Aomine smile, he didn't know what could. And if Aomine wouldn't smile through his situation, then the blond didn't want to know how much he was going through.

Kise had silently cursed himself for months. He had not been strong enough, or enough of a skilled player to be a worthy opponent to the bluenet. Because of that, Aomine stopped smiling. He stopped attending training practices. He stopped playing one-on-one like he always would.

The blond let out a bitter smile. Even when he had finally beat Aomine, the bluenet hadn't smiled. In fact, Aomine had only seemed to grow more sombre. That was what made Kise wonder if he was simply too late. The thought hurt a lot more than it should've.

He knew where Aomine had gone after every game, even if Satsuki didn't. He had watched the bluenet when his own team didn't know where he was. He had seen Aomine's condition gradually grow worse. Nobody else seemed to notice it – not even Momoi. If she did notice it, then she was keeping perfect guard of it.

Was everyone blind to the fact that Aomine was ill? The sudden phrase blared through his mind like a foghorn, causing Kise to wince. Aomine was _sick_ and no one was even trying to do a thing about it? Kise really couldn't care less about what Aomine wanted at this point. The bluenet _had_ to see a doctor.

He frowned, and pulled out his phone as he stopped at the door of his house. Before he stepped in, he sent a quick text to 'Aominecchi'.

 _Aominecchi! Plsplsplsplspls come over to my place! I have to talk with you!_

He received no immediate reply, and frowned. Still, he decided to wait. Taking a key from his pocket, he unlocked the door, and stepped in, locking it behind him. Quickly, he made his way to his bedroom upstairs. One there, he locked himself in, and cannoned onto his bed.

Pulling out his phone once more, he stared at it as if that would send a reply faster. When the buzzing sound of text ran through his phone, he almost dropped it in surprise. To his disappointment, however, it wasn't from Aomine, but from Momoi.

 _Ki-chan, I can't find Dai-chan anywhere! I was going to take him his jacket because he forgot it at school, and we didn't walk home together, but I can't find him! Do you know where Dai-chan is?_

Kise frowned at the message.

 _Momoicchi! I saw Aominecchi while I was on my way home, actually. No idea where he is now..._

Which was the truth. They had parted ways, and for all Kise knew, Aomine could be anywhere. He honestly hadn't the slightest clue where the blunet might be. He contemplated the nearby basketball court, but decided against it. Aomine didn't like basketball like he used to.

 _Oh. Thanks anyway, Ki-chan!_ Kise didn't have the heart to respond to that.

The blond sighed and leaned back, staring up at the ceiling. Aomine had probably told Momoi, he supposed. After all, the bluenet was very close with the manager of his team. He wouldn't keep something so crucial away from her, of all people.

A slight frown made a small pout on his lips. He was worried about that idiot for who knows how many years, and Aomine never realized it. He had good reason to be worried about Aomine too! The bluenet was seriously ill, and had been for who knows how long.

The blond shook his head and stood up, throwing on his coat. He was going to go find the blueberry baka and give him a piece of his thoughts – maybe knock some sense through that thick skull of his. Surely Aomine was not so much of an idiot that he wouldn't realize how serious this was.

Kise quickly ran out of his house, and down the street in the direction that he had travelled back. With any luck, Aomine hadn't walked too far away from the place where they had last been. Kise could almost roll his eyes at himself. Oh who was he trying to delude, honestly? Aomine had always been much faster than he was. Even if he could mimic the speed of the bluenet, it always took a large toll on his body.

His steps as he ran were hammered by his tan hued coat. He continued to run anyway, looking from side to the other as he searched for a familiar shock of blue hair. He found none, and eventually slowed to the stop, a frustrated look within his eyes.

Oh what was the use? He probably wouldn't even lis- Kise abruptly cut off his own train of thought as he heart a familiar sound. He followed it to a park basketball court, and wasn't all that surprised to find the person he was seeking lazily bouncing the ball, before flicking his wrist upward resulting in the ball flying through the hoop.

Even if Kise no longer adulated the bluenet's erratic, unpredictable movements, that didn't mean he didn't admire Aomine himself. He just didn't admire his skills any longer. If he continued to do that, he would never hope to catch up to him.

He stood there watching silently as the bluenet lazily dribbled the ball, not even seeming to care about it. Kise's eyes narrowed. He could see that the bluenet had cleaned off his lips, but that didn't stop him from seeing fresher spots.

As he watched silently, the tanned player's muscles seemed to tense, before he began to cough, holding his hand up to his mouth. His coughs were deep and harsh – obviously he was ill. Kise wanted to jump out there and yell at him for his stupidity, but he didn't.

When the attack had ended and Aomine's hand lowered from his mouth, Kise was horrified. He had seen how it was in middle school, and he had seen how it was during their games. However, he had never seen it like this.

Almost the entirety of the bluenet's hand was covered in a crimson that could rival Akashi's hair. As Kise watched, Aomine wiped off the bloody appendage on the grass nearby, before returning for his basketball. It was then that Kise decided to step out.

"Ne, Aominecchi! I was looking for you!" he called, his voice laced with fake cheer. He could see the bluenet's muscles tense before relaxing in a manner that obviously seemed forced. Kise picked up the basketball before Aomine could reach for it.

"What do you want, Kise?" Aomine's tone was in no way amicable, and could even be counter harsher than normal. It was even somewhat hoarse due to his earlier bout of coughing. Kise grinned, although he felt like screaming at the bluenet.

"I want a game of one-on-one!" he lied. Aomine scowled.

"No."

"Why?" Kise taunted, his free hand beginning to unzip his coat. "You think you'll lose?" Aomine snorted.

"Of course not. The only one who-"

"Can beat you, is me," Kise interrupted, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. Aomine raised an eyebrow.

"You're too full of yourself."

"I could say the same for you," Kise chirped, his cheery smirk on his features. He could see that Aomine was arguing with himself whether to accept the challenge or not. Kise blinked. Perhaps a little more encouragement. "You don't want to lose to me _again,_ do you," he stated.

"Damn you, Kise. Give me the ball," Aomine stated, sounding annoyed. Kise grinned. Score! He pulled his coat off his shoulders and dropped it at the edge of the court as he tossed Aomine the basketball. His smile soon dissipated.

Why had he done that again? He hadn't run after the bluenet to play basketball with him! He had gone after him so that he could knock some sense into him! At the purposeful dribbling, he assumed that it was too late to change his mind, and took up a defensive stance.

His eyes flashed with the challenge he had involuntarily put out. He had seen how Aomine would play, and if he had to exert himself to have the bluenet enjoy playing again, then he would. The click he could see in Aomine's eyes told him that the bluenet saw this. He grinned as they began their match.

Kise lost. It wasn't as much of a surprise as it would have been. That is, if his chest wasn't heaving with tiredness. He felt ready to just fall onto the cement and take a nap then and there. As a matter of fact, the only thing keeping him from doing so was the coldness of the air around him.

He stole a glance at Aomine, and his smile fell. The bluenet didn't look any happier at all. And Kise had tried to play to the best of his ability too. Minus the zone, of course. He shook his head, clearing it out, before letting out a small exhale of breath.

"All right. What do you want?" Aomine questioned, his voice still harsh. Kise fought back a flinch, and glared at the bluenet.

"I want answers," he replied. The raised eyebrow was a good act, he'd admit, but he wasn't _that_ stupid, despite popular opinion. Aomine's shoulders had stiffened slightly, signalling discomfort, and possibly even distress.

"...what." Kise frowned. And that was the decisive factor. Aomine had paused, as if almost reluctant to answer. He lowered his eyes, wondering if he had made a good choice in pursuing the bluenet after all. The exhaustion he had felt was quickly taken over by a new rush of frustrated adrenaline.

"Why are you hiding this?" he questioned, his voice harsher than intended. Aomine scowled, averting his eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yes you do! Stop lying, Aominecchi!"

"I'm not lying!"

"Yes you are!"

"Well then what are you talking about? What am I hiding?" Aomine growled, his voice dropping almost an octave as he glared at the blond. Kise stopped short. He lowered his eyes as his fingers rolled themselves into tight fists by his side.

"You're sick, idiot! You've been sick for a long time. And you're...hiding it from everyone." He could hear an angry hiss from the bluenet.

"I'm not sick!" Kise raised an eyebrow, and lifted his head to look at Aomine.

"Then explain this!" he demanded, a slender, accusing, digit pointing at the spots of blood by Aomine's lips. He could tell that the bluenet was trying his best to not make eye contact.

"I just got into a fight," he lied lamely. Kise gritted his teeth.

"Fight? _Fight?_ Yeah, you're fighting. You're fighting your illness, you idiot! Why didn't you tell anyone?" Aomine scowled.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Kise's hand dropped back to his side, his nails digging painfully into his palm.

"Why didn't you tell _us?_ You never even told Momoicchi or Kurokocchi and you're ridiculously close to them!" He knew his voice was rising in both pitch and volume, but he didn't care.

"If I don't even tell _them,_ then what makes you think I'll tell _you,_ huh?" Aomine snarled. Kise shrank back, reeling from the blow of the words that Aomine had spoken. The bluenet looked frazzled, as far as he could tell. The blond couldn't help but feel a little guilty. Perhaps he was the one that had frayed Aomine's nerves.

"You...you..." Kise couldn't form a decent sentence in response to the barb no matter how much he fumbled with it. Aomine scowled, the anger in his eyes so strong that it struck Kise full force, almost pushing him backwards.

"It's none of your business. Don't ever bring up that subject again," Aomine hissed, turning his back to the blonde. Kise was about to yell for him to wait, but then deemed it useless. Aomine wouldn't listen to him anyway.

He could feel his eyes beginning to burn as a severe throbbing ache tugged at his chest. His hand reached up to his shirt, and he grasped the fabric, his jaw clenched together so tightly that it was painful. He lowered his head in defeat as small rivulets of water trailed down his cheeks.

Why was he so riled up about this anyway? Aomine had been acting perfectly fine over the years, so what made this so different? Perhaps now that he had finally brought the harrowing subject to light before the bluenet, it had triggered the reaction that had remained for a long time buried.

But it hurt – it really did. The way Aomine had simply thrown him off with a lone remark...that hateful expression burning deep within his eyes like a black flame that wanted to devour all it came into contact with.

The blond bit back a choked sob. He knew exactly why it hurt so bad. It was because of the fragment in his heart that was neither ambition to win, nor admiration for the bluenet. It was something that was immensely difficult to contend with despite how small it was.

Could the bluenet not see how many times he would stare unabashedly back in middle school? Did he not know that all those games of one-on-one were merely excuses to be with him? He loved basketball, true, but he loved the one who had introduced him to the sport even more.

Honestly, Kise couldn't care any more if Aomine liked or hated him. He was just worried – _afraid_ even. He could clearly see the rapid diminishing of the bluenet's health. He didn't care what Aomine thought of him – he just wanted the bluenet to get help.

His entire life was practically a cheap show, overrun by innumerable cliches. This was one of them, because he was sure that he'd choose Aomine's health over his own happiness. If it meant Aomine could live out a life not hampered by illness, he'd gladly give anything.

Did the bluenet not realize that? Perhaps not. All his life, Aomine had been walking step in step with Momoi and Kuroko. Anyone with eyes could see that. Even if Kuroko no longer attended the same school as Aomine, they were still as close as they had always been.

And sometimes the glare of the light completely eradicated the shadows. Kise had been trying all his life to be able to walk step in step with the bluenet, but once he had, Aomine hadn't been pleased at all. Kise gritted his teeth, his head resting against his knees, which were hugged close to his chest.

It didn't seem to matter any more. His feelings meant nothing, after all. The only thing he could possibly do was somehow get help for the bluenet. He didn't want to continue seeing Aomine like this. Even if the only look the bluenet would have for him was that hateful glare. He'd rather suffer that.

With that thought in mind, he pushed himself to his feet and slipped on his coat, his eyes dry. He was going home.

* * *

Kise yawned, and rubbed at his eyes when he heard the sound of his phone ringing. He groaned. Who calls at eleven anyway? He shook the slumber out of his head, and grabbed his phone, staring at the number. He blinked. Wasn't that...the hospital? He picked up the call.

"Hello? Is this Kise Ryouta?" Kise blinked. He didn't recognize that voice.

"Yes," he answered simply, placing a false smile in his voice. "Who is this?" he questioned. The voice on the other end was quiet for a moment before speaking.

"Kise-san, there is someone in the hospital that wants to see you." Kise frowned. More fangirls? He knew how to deal with fangirls, but for one thing, how did they know his number, and for another, why were they sending for him at a hospital?

One could only be polite, he supposed. He allowed a slight sigh to pass his lips. "I'll be there soon," he stated calmly. "But who is it that's calling me?" he questioned. There was a pause at the other end.

"They said that they want you to see for yourself." Kise raised an eyebrow. Somehow, the choice of phrasing seemed somewhat familiar... He nodded to himself.

"I'll be there soon," he stated, ending the call.

He ran his digits through his blond locks, noting the fact that he had bedhead. If he listened to the hospital, that meant he would most likely be dead tired at school tomorrow. He frowned. He didn't want to be kicked around the court again.

He wondered why the hospital would allow a visitor after the visiting hours. They were usually strict concerning that rule. He decided to blame it on his reputation. Maybe it was his career that caused the special treatment.

But...how did the hospital know his number? He had never given it to anyone working there. He frowned. He'd just have to go to find out. Quickly, he slipped out of his pyjamas. Grabbing an off-white shirt, he pulled it over his chest before throwing a black vest over it and following up with black jeans.

He yawned, and quickly teased through his hair until it was decently combed. His job wouldn't allow him to be seen in public with a look that was less than appealing, after all. His instinctive nature played into that a little, but who could blame him, really?

Grabbing his tan coat, he pulled it on, before grabbing a random scarf from a rack in the corner. He half-consciously recognized the blue plaid, but paid it no mind as he slipped on socks and shoes before walking out of his room.

He quietly made his way out of the house, locking the door behind him, before beginning his walk to the hospital. He didn't live in the main city, but he was not too far away from it. He would be able to make it to the hospital in approximately fifteen minutes.

The night air, if at all possible, was even more bitter than daytime. He could clearly see his breath, even in the dark, as he exhaled into the freezing night. He sped up his steps slightly in hopes that it would warm him up a little.

Perhaps he should have worn gloves as well. Dryly, he stuck his hands into his pockets in attempts to get his blood flowing once more. He wondered how Murasakibara coped with the winter weather in Akita. Maybe all those snacks were giving him an extra layer beneath his jacket.

Finally, he made it to the hospital building. He walked in, and saw a receptionist at the front table. Of course there were people that worked night shifts. After all, injuries or ailments that merited professional medical assistance didn't only happen during the day.

He walked up to the receptionist, who seemed to just notice him. She riffled through a pile of papers before setting them down on the desk and looking up at him.

"Do you need any help?" she questioned. He stared at her for a moment.

"I've come to see someone," he stated. She pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose.

"I'm fairly certain you know that visiting hours are over, sir?" He nodded, and lowered his scarf.

"Yes, I know. But someone sent for me." She blinked and stared at him for a moment, before her eyes widened.

"Kise Ryouta?" He nodded, his eyes a little mellow, which was unusual for him. He could see a small blush on the receptionist's face. No surprise there. But he was still a little unnerved. This was a grown woman looking at him like a teenage girl.

"Ah, yes...I do believe that someone called for you on urgency. Room 425," she stated. He nodded, an automatic smile fluttering over his lips.

"Thank you," he called, before heading over to the lift. With any luck, they had not yet locked it. He headed up to the fourth floor where he was sure his summons would be.

Silently, he waited until the doors opened, and he stepped out. He glanced at the doors while walking down the hall. Reaching the desired door, he hesitated, his hand resting on the handle, before drawing in a breath, and twisting the handle, simultaneously pushing the door open.

He could hear the slow beep of a monitor. His eyes immediately flew over to the sound, and spotted the device giving off the sound. The lights were off, and he had no heart to turn them on. He could see that this room housed only one person. That meant a few things, and none of them were good. He spotted the silhouette of a lamp by a table on the side.

Walking over, he turned the lamp on, before looking down at the bed, wondering who had called him. His eyes widened.

"A-Aominecchi?" Then again, it did make sense. Aomine had his number, and he could have given it to the hospital so that they could call him. But why didn't Aomine call himself? Forget that – why was Aomine in a hospital?

Why would Aomine even want to see him anyway? After what happened yesterday, there was almost absolutely no doubt in his mind that the bluenet wouldn't want to so much as think of him.

He could see something in the bluenet's hand that looked suspiciously like a letter. He wondered who it was from. Or if it was from Aomine, who it was for. Curiosity got the better of him, and before he knew it, he reached for the letter.

The movement earned him a twitch from the bluenet. His head flew back to look at Aomine's face, and he spotted lashes fluttering as they slowly opened. He stepped back, his face flushing in embarrassment. He was soon met with sapphire eyes.

He stared at Aomine, unable to fathom what he was seeing. Aomine's facial expression was flat, but it was not that. It was the bluenet's eyes that forcefully knocked him off guard. He could see a light in them that he recognized – the same one from back in middle school. The one he missed.

 _Kise._ He could see the bluenet's lips move to form his name, but no words passed his lips. Kise stared Aomine lifted the hand holding the letter, and held it out in his direction. Hesitantly, the blond's hand took the paper from his grasp.

At a nod from the bluenet, who seemed a little uncomfortable about something, he opened the letter, and scanned his eyes over the words, written messily in a way that only Aomine could manage at his age. Kise almost smiled. He then began to read.

 _Kise, damn you. Seriously. You are such a pain in the ass. I don't know what I'll do with you around. So yeah. Damn you. Anyway, I wasn't thinking of starting a letter off like this, but to hell with that. I'm not doing any of that cliché 'dear' stuff. Especially not when you'll be reading this while I'm in the same room as you. I've heard that it's better to be yourself, so why not?_

 _ANYWAY, you're wondering why I wrote this thing when we're in the same room. Don't even try to deny it, idiot, I know you are. The doctors have told me to refrain from talking. I don't care what they think, I'm just listening because it hurts to talk. Yeah. My throat hurts like hell right now._

 _Make a comment on that last sentence and I'll kill you, I swear. Now you're wondering why the I'd call you here when you're the last person I want to see. Well guess what. I called you here because I want to. I have my reasons for it, and you are going to listen to them. And yes, I am telling them to you. (If you're thinking of something incredibly stupid, then tell your mind to shut up.)_

Kise noted that there were plenty of scratch marks around here, and he wondered why.

 _I've had this terminal illness ever since I was two. Yeah. I should've been dead a long time ago. Shut up. I know what a terminal illness is. I'm the one who has it. Geez. All you people are such idiots. Anyway, so I've had it since two._

 _What's the point in being all mopey and pitiful and emo and all that shit when you know you're going to die eventually? Everyone dies eventually, and there's no getting out of it. It's just that people with sicknesses like me tend to die sooner. Again. Shut up. And don't you dare judge._

 _Why do you think I never told anyone? I don't want anyone going all mopey or pity me or all that other shit. That's pointless too. Look. I've known I was going to die ever since I learned what the word 'die' meant. So what's the point in being scared of it, or whatever? I didn't want to live the rest of my life regretting everything._

 _Geez. You're really annoying, you know. Making me spit out all this. My life is mine, you hear? I can do what I want. And if that means living like a normal person then I will. I don't want your pity or your special treatment like I'm disabled, okay? _

_Basketball always has, and always will be a huge part of my life. Man, that's cheesy. Damn you Kise. Maybe your cheesiness is rubbing off on me._

More scribbling.

 _I like the part of sports where you have to fight for victory. If there's no will to fight, then you can just throw the game because there's no point. It's like this TB thing. It's a losing battle, even I know that. But that doesn't stop me from fighting! I wont stop fighting if that means I can live longer and have another day and see the rest of you damn Generation of Miracles and ugh._

Kise could see that the ink had smeared on this part of the letter, and he could feel a prickling sensation at the back of his eyes. He had a feeling he knew how the ink had smeared.

 _Because...ah screw this. I don't hate life all right? There. I wrote it. I really don't get all those emo kids, wishing that they were dead and cutting and all that. If you're alive, then why wish you were dead? People are really huge idiots._

 _Why did I fall out of basketball, that's probably another question you're thinking of. Well, I wrote it earlier, but you're probably not the person who would see it anyway. It's because of the battle. Basketball is a battle for victory._

 _I like the battle – it's always a huge thing when you can feel the adrenaline. Shut up. I'm not myself, I know, but that doesn't mean you can make an internal commentary on how I'm not like myself! So shut up. Anyway, having to fight everyday taught the value of never giving up. When I saw all those other players giving up once I started playing to the fullest of my ability, I hated it. I hated it. They weren't fighting. They were giving in to the disease. I don't want to play people like that._

 _I want to play against people who will struggle in the middle of a hopeless battle if there's a thread of a chance that they'll win. Even if they do end up losing, those are the people I'd play against. The people who wouldn't let previous losses or immense odds weigh them down. The ones that would fight until they're dead, or until they win._

 _I really want to scratch out those lines you know? A lot of the stuff in here is stuff that I would never actually say out loud, by the way. But I won't scratch them out, because that's something I guess I gotta say. Besides – it's easier to write them down than to say them out loud. Once more, shut the hell up._

Kise swallowed a sound that threatened to exit his throat. Whether it was a sob or laughter, he didn't know. All he did know, was that familiar droplets of water were squeezing their way out of his eyes, and his lips were curved up into a small smile. It really was like Aomine was reading his mind while writing this.

 _Damn doctors. They aren't letting me out of here. I'll jump out the window if that's what it takes to escape this prison. I swear – this place will drive me mad sooner than you will. Idiot. You're always sticking your head in where it doesn't belong._

 _Anyway, I can't believe I'm writing this, but I guess I have to say it sometime. You are all my friends. That was embarrassing, dammit! Damn you, Kise, why do you always have to insist on embarrassing things? This includes Akashi, Midorima, Murasakibara, Satsuki, and Tetsu. Oh yeah. It includes you too, right? Hah. I bet I got you on that one. Surprisingly, it also includes that Bakagami. And Sakurai, I guess. He's funny to scare. Oh fuck this. The entire Touou basketball team counts as something even though they are as annoying as hell, I guess._

 _Fuck you, Kise. I know you're laughing. I'm watching you._

 _So anyway, the last few questions, right? All right. Why am I saying all this. Well. I'm in a hospital room right now. You know what, Kise? I have a newsflash for you. I'm dying. Yes, I just said that. Now let me rewrite that for you. I, Aomine Daiki, ace of the Generation of Miracles and Touou, am dying._ _Wow. That's a pretty long title. I think it's something that carrot-top would write. Or at least, that's his style. (Carrot top is referring to Midorima, of course. Tell him I called him that. I wish I could see the look on his face.)_

 _Anyway, I'm dying. You know a terminal illness is basically incurable, right? I've been dying ever since I was two, so this isn't big news or anything. I've been in a hospital situation like this before. They thought I would die may times before, but I always fought it. But this time it's worse, so they think I won't make it. Well fuck them._

 _So. Are we done with the stupid regalia, yet? It's like I'm signing my own death certificate or something. It's making me fucking depressed. Help me out Kise, dammit! Oh wait. Whatever. The most you'd do is probably smile like an idiot. Speaking of smile like an idiot, don't expect me to not know the difference between your fake model smile and your real smile. If you pull that model smile to make me feel better, I will personally rearrange your face._

 _There. That makes me feel better. So anyway, the doctors said I'm gonna die. Huge surprise there. Not like I wasn't expecting it. So why am I telling you first instead of carrot-top? Eh, why would I tell carrot-top? And why you instead of Satsuki? Because you wouldn't throw your arms around my neck the moment you set your eyes on me and cry me an ocean. Maybe something pretty close, but not quite._

 _Now why you instead of Tetsu._

The most scribbles were in this area, Kise noted. Almost to the point of ripping the paper at some intervals. He wondered what the bluenet was trying to write.

 _Damn. I just can't say it straight, can I? Well then. Dammit this is fucking embarrassing. I swear. I guess I never wanted to tell you because you'd get all angry and not want to talk to me and all that pansy girly stuff. You know, since you're a model. Then when I looked on the other side, you'd get all weepy and depressed and stuff. I don't know which is worse, really._

Kise raised an eyebrow slightly at the black that took over the next section once more.

 _I HAVE FUCKING FEELINGS FOR YOU THAT ARE NOT RIPPING YOUR PRETTY-BOY FACE OFF YOUR HEAD AND RUNNING OVER IT WITH A SEMITRUCK!_

What.

 _Geez, you are so hard to write for, dammit! I bet you didn't even get that sentence, did you. I fucking love you and it's goddamn embarrassing! Now I have no idea how you'll react to that so I don't know what to write now. Goddammit._

 _I wrote that, and you're going to read it. I just wanted you to fucking know, all right? I don't care how you feel about it. I'm just not in the mood for dying with regrets. Why do you think I threw a basketball at your head? Yeah, I planned that too. I knew enough to know you'd like sports, and you never played basketball._

 _By the way, I really don't care much for your face (although a pretty face is still appreciated). It's your character that stuck out. Damn. I'm writing really awkward things in here. You'd better not laugh! You can always smile even if it's fake. But you know what I really like? I like your real smile. You know, the one that reaches your eyes and practically makes your face shine. Dammit. What the hell am I writing, a love letter? Huh, maybe I am._

 _You're part of the reason why I never got depressed because of this situation, Kise. You're always so idiotically sunshine and roses and whatnot. Did you know it's really hard to not smile when you're acting like that? It's is very hard. I don't know how Tetsu does it._

 _Because frankly, Kise? You are as annoying as hell. And I wouldn't have it any other way, because any other way would mean that it wasn't Kise. And your skills? Even if you still can't beat me in one-on-one doesn't mean I can't say you're a hell of a good player. God, this is ._

 _So anyway, I'm pretty sure I love you, and I want to tell you that. All the stories say that love is supposed to be some spark or happiness you feel when you're with the person you love. Well guess what, Kise. It's not. Or at least, not for me. For me it's the worry. I'd probably never be able to say all this sappy stuff if I could talk to you properly, by the way, so don't expect anything much out of this letter._

 _You do not know how much you worry me, Kise! You're so damn irritating! (Maybe what I really worry about is your sanity) I didn't tell you because I didn't want to load your mind with more problems that are not defeating me. I probably sound like an entirely different person, right? If that's what you're thinking right now, and you're doubting what I've written, then I have one thing to say to you. Oh, and Kise? I can love who I want even if they don't love me back._

 _Back to the time where I threw a basketball at your head._

 _The rest was easy. Just impress you, and I'd get to spend more time with you. Argh damn you Kise this is so fucking mortifying to write! I hope you're fucking satisfied! Why do you think I always played all those games of one-on-one with you? Because you never gave up all those two hundred and fifty-three times you lost. _

_But then why did I quit one-on-one with you? Because I didn't want you to become like the rest of those idiots and give up. It's only a matter of time, right? You're probably thinking about how stupid I am for thinking that. Well guess what, it's my mind, not yours. How am I supposed to know what you're thinking?_

 _So anyway, there. I did what you wanted and answered all your questions. You're so annoying, Kise. Did I ever tell you that? You're also so predictable. That's how I knew what you wanted to ask even though you never told me your questions._

 _There. I'm running out of paper, so I'll stop. Now scream out how stupid I am to my face, I don't care. I've told you what I want to. Oh yeah. And don't think that what I wrote in there means I'm giving up There is no fucking way that I'm giving up. I know what a losing battle is, and I will fight against it, even if I know I'll lose. Don't you dare underestimate me._

 _Oh yeah. And sorry for being so coarse in the letter. I suppose anyone would be a little stressed if their confessing that they love someone and that they're dying at the same time. But honestly Kise? I really do love you. More than teriyaki burgers. Yeah. You're still annoying, but don't change, all right?_

 _Man...I feel like writing more sappy stuff, but I'm seriously running out of paper. All right what else. Oh. I don't really mind if you don't feel the same as long as I got to tell you. I mean, the doctors were really serious about this thing._

 _Anything else...oh yeah. I guess I'm stressed. It definitely sounds like I'm stressed now that I read over it. It's probably instinct to be afraid of things like this. I'm not really all that scared, but I guess it's natural for my body to feel stressed about this._

 _You're either going to burst out laughing, or burst out crying. Whichever, it's going to be annoying, and it's going to make me worry a hell of a lot more. So take care of yourself. If you don't, I will take what I said before to heart, and rearrange your face. Yeah, you know I wouldn't do that._

 _My mind must really be getting stressed. Just for the record, I wouldn't be this coarse with you all the time. I think that this is taking it's toll on my body. Geez. I don't even know what you'd be thinking by now. I guess I'll just have to wait for your reaction, huh?_

 _Oh yeah, one more thing. Man, so much for ending back there. I don't want anyone else to know about this. Yeah, do me a favour and don't let anyone know this. Not even Tetsu or Satsuki. This stays between you and me._

 _So. With that, I guess I'll end. Fuck you Kise. I love you._

Kise didn't know whether he should be crying or laughing. Aomine just had that ability to make him do both. He sat down in a chair that was by the bed, an expression of shock printed on his face. He sat there, staring blankly at nothing, his mind reeling with all the newfound facts.

When he finally came to his senses, he stared at Aomine, who merely smirked at him, his face a little paler than usual. Kise bit his lip, before acting like the girl that Aomine said he was, and breaking down into tears.

He didn't know what to do. He never knew Aomine had felt in such a way. He was so stupid! If only he'd known sooner...Kise's head dropped into his hands as quiet sobs racked his frame. He had no idea...and now he was going to regret it, wasn't he?

His heart felt constricted, almost to the point of rendering him unable to breathe. Nevertheless, it was painful. He had dated girls before, and of course, he had broken up with them. But never had he felt such heartache as he did now.

It was pulling at him, constricting him, strangling him, drowning him. It was, in short, almost killing him. He had thought the pain he felt yesterday when blue eyes fixed themselves so hatefully on him, was the worst that he had felt. Well...that was easily beaten.

He tensed as he felt a slight weight on his head. He lifted his head to see a disapproving look in the bluenet's eyes, followed by the annoyed from on his lips. Kise realized that the weight was, in truth, Aomine's hand.

"...idiot." The single word almost broke another dam for Kise, but he forced himself not to. Aomine had made it very obvious in his letter that he didn't want anyone's pity. Kise took the hand on his head, and held it in both of his, a small blush on his face.

He glanced over at the bluenet, and could see a blush on Aomine's features as well, followed with a slight pout and averted eyes. Kise's eyes watered, as his lips curled into a small smile. It was just so ridiculously adorable to see an expression like that on Aomine's face, he couldn't help the small burst of laughter from passing his lips.

He could see the blue eyes flick over to his in surprise, and he grinned slightly. To his surprise, he was rewarded with a slight smirk – the same one he had grown so familiar with previously. He chuckled before beginning to laugh.

"Aominecchi, you're the idiot," Kise retorted, a genuine smile on his face.

"...shut up." Kise laughed. He could feel a slight tug from his hands, and realized Aomine was pulling away. He released the bluenet's hand, allowing him to do as he wished. To his surprise, the hand reached over to his face and drew it in.

"I don't need your approval," was the breath that was blown in the direction of his ear, before his lips met Aomine's. He smiled. That was like the bluenet. His own hand slowly drifted over to the olive-skinned ace's jawline.

He knew Aomine would never really do it if he didn't want to. Aomine simply didn't need his approval because the bluenet knew he had it, and had had it for the longest of times. Although both of them were probably stupid for not realizing it.

He laughed slightly as he pulled away. That smirk was still visible on Aomine's face. Kise could have rolled his eyes, but didn't feel like it at the moment. He opted instead for conveying all his annoyed amusement at the bluenet through the silence between them.

His attention then fell to the letter in his hands, He folded it, and pocketed it for safekeeping. Aomine's hand dropped from it's place on his cheek. He looked up at the bluenet, and could see the visible tensing in his muscles.

His eyes widened as Aomine's hand flew to his mouth and he broke into another bout of harsh coughing. Kise silently prayed that it would stop. It went on for at least half a minute or more, before Aomine finally lowered his hand, his body trembling from exertion.

Kise bit his lip and stared at the blood. Wasn't it only supposed to be a little? Normally it was only a little...not this much.. It was dripping from Aomine's mouth, already covering his hand...

Kise had never seen Aomine looking so weak to the point that he would be struggling for breath after simply coughing. His muscles were twitching spasmodically, and he wouldn't stop trembling. Kise could hear the heart monitor, and it definitely did not speak good tidings.

"Kise." His eyes met with the bluenet's at the sound of his name. "Go." The word was followed by a cough. Kise could feel his eyes watering once again. The moment of solace he had a moment ago was now tossed into tempest, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

He hesitated for a moment, before nodding, and quickly making his way out of the room, even as he heard footsteps that signalled that the doctors and nurses and whatnot were headed for Aomine. He rubbed at his eyes.

Aomine knew this was coming, didn't he? But he didn't want to have any regrets, and Kise would make sure he didn't have any regrets. Furiously, he rubbed his eyes, before practically running out of the hospital, not wanting to be within the same building as Aomine any longer.

The night was as cold and dark as the bitter dread that settled in the pits of Kise's stomach. He felt sick. Sick with what, he didn't know. All he did know, was that Aomine was leaving. Kise could feel hot drops of water spill out of his eyes.

How would everyone else take this? All the Generation of Miracles, Momoi, even Touou's basketball team? If his team meant something to him, that had to mean he was more than a trump card for Touou, right? After what he had admitted, he'd better be.

Kise shivered as he ran, and finally made it to the door of his home after what seemed like forever. Opening the door, he ran in, and shut it behind him before running upstairs. Locking himself in his room, he fell onto his knees in defeat, tears running down his face.

* * *

Kise had spoken to no one about what had happened, but everyone suspected that something was wrong with him. He wondered how on earth it hadn't been passed on amongst his friends yet. Surely they would soon know of what had happened. It had already been a week ever since he had left for the hospital after all.

He was growing more sombre because of it, and his forced smiles were easily categorized as fake. Was it his fault really?

He pulled the paper out of his pocket, and read over it for perhaps the millionth time already. Training was as troublesome as always, but basketball seemed to have lost its shine. Kise still played – it was the least he could do. But there was something missing.

He sighed softly, before a spot of water fell onto the letter. He reached up to his face, and realized that he was crying. He hadn't even known.

Rubbing at his eyes, he continued to walk home, his steps dragging. He couldn't believe this. None of the Kiseki – not even Kuroko or Momoi – knew. Momoi had only passed him off as sick, since she couldn't contact him through his phone.

Kise frowned. He didn't want to think about matters like that, but they would always assuage him regardless of how hard he fought against the onslaught. How...hard...he...fought... Kise's eyes widened, and his steps slowed.

What was he doing? The way he was acting was a complete disgrace. He was an idiot, as Aomine would have said. Why was he moping around and growing distant from everyone? Why was he so sad? Aomine would never play against him if he was that sort of person.

So he would fight. Through the confusion, pain, and grief. He would fight through it until he could face the world with a genuine smile again. After all, he wanted to be someone who Aomine would count worthy to play a match of basketball with. The thought brought a smile to his face.

His next step was taken with determination, as was the one after that, and the one after that. He lifted his head, and began to walk. He stopped before his house, and glanced over it. He didn't know why he did, he merely did.

He unlocked the door, before stepping in, and locking it behind him. No sooner did he hang up his coat and scarf on a rack in the hall did he hear a knock on the door. He silently wondered who it was. Contemplating on whether he should open it or not, he noted that whoever was outside was growing frustrated.

Finally, he opened the door. And stared.

"Damn you, Kise! I'm freezing my ass off out here and you're just standing there staring at a piece of wood."

"A..." Kise couldn't even form that single name.

"And now you're stammering like you're the one that's cold! What are you doing?"

"Ao..." The teen smirked, before his features softened into something more of a smile.

"I told you not to underestimate me, idiot. I told you I would fight, even if it was a losing battle. The war's still going on, Kise, but I won that battle."

"Aomin..." Kise still couldn't force his lips to listen to him. Aomine's annoyed expression returned.

"So hurry up and invite me in before I die of hypothermia!"

Kise quickly pulled the bluenet in at that, before throwing his arms around Aomine.

"Aominecchi!" Aomine smirked.

"This illness can't win. The only one who can beat me, is me."

* * *

For all of you that read this to the end, you are amazing. Seriously. I don't know who would read this to the end. You've completely exceeded my expectations, and you are amazing. In the rough draft, I was actually going to kill Aomine, but I couldn't do it. I seriously couldn't do it. No matter how cute a crying Kise is, when it's actually something serious, it's heartbreaking. Oh yeah, and my headcanon is that Aomine grows really coarse when he's stressed. No regrets. Regrets. A lot of 'em. Anyway, bye!


End file.
